Drunk Apples
by The C-Era War
Summary: Humanstuck! - Gamzee throws a party at Karkat's house and invites everybody. Eridan gets drunk off bobbing for apples and tons of events fall into place after that… Horrible summary, better fanfic. Warning!: Karkat/Terezi, Sollux/Aradia and a variety of other ships. May contain yaoi and/or yuri. Multiple POVs. T rating for language. Disclaimer: Andrew Hussie owns Homestuck.
1. Chapter 1

**Drunk Apples**

**Humanstuck! - Gamzee throws a party at Karkat's house and invites everybody. Eridan gets drunk off bobbing for apples and tons of events fall into place after that… Horrible summary, better fanfic. Warning!: Karkat/Terezi, Sollux/Aradia and a variety of other ships. May contain yaoi and/or yuri. Multiple POVs. T rating for language. Disclaimer: Andrew Hussie owns Homestuck.**

Your name is Karkat Vantas, and you see absolutely no reason why you should let the high clown that is your friend host a party. At _your_ house.

"No way you fucktard! Do it at your own fucking place!"

"Come on bro, you know that my apartment complex doesn't allow parties."

You sigh, smacking your hand into your face at Gamzee's reply. You felt like punching his face off to the fricking sun, but knew that the feat was impossible. Right now, your level of anger was about 4 out of 10. That lucky bastard. You could tell just by how Gamzee was telling you about the party that he already told everyone it was at your place. You feel the urge to hit your head against a wall, but not before something much worse happens.

"Oh yeah, forgot to mention. It starts in about an hour bro. You should probably get ready." He said smiling, making your anger scale go from 4 to over 9000.

"You are so fucking lucky that I was in a fucking good mood before you came." You growl, aggravated with him and his uncaring attitude.

He raises his hand up as if surrendering, and then saunters off to the kitchen, probably to make a bar out of it with an assorted variety of weird alcoholic beverages. You shudder. You don't want to know what he puts in them, so you walk away to clean up the house a bit. You start with the living room and work your way around, getting to your room last. As you finish making your bed, you hear the bell ring. Shit.

"Hello!" A high pitch voice says, making you flinch.

You hear Gamzee greet the person at the door, and lets the person in, probably being followed in by the others. You hear running that stops at your door, but you make no move to hide. Instead you stand there frozen. As you hear the door open, you freeze in your spot completely.

Oh no. Oh _fuck_ no.

The person behind you tries to cover up their cackle, but there was no use.

There is no hope for you now.

"Hey Karkles!" they screech loudly.

Shit.

You feel someone jump onto your back and face-plant you into your bed. Their cackle is extremely loud as they sit on your back, probably not caring that you can hear them now. You turn your head around so that they could see your anger.

"Terezi, get the fuck off of me!" you growl, but you don't get the reaction you wanted.

She cackles again, this time louder, at your anger. You push her off of you and adjust your beds wrinkles. You are aware that Vriska was standing at the doorway, and you hope that she wasn't plotting to mess up your room. You turn to both of them, giving them a face that said, 'Get the fuck out of here.' Vriska abided with a smile as she dragged Terezi out of the room. A smile. That wasn't a good sign. You take out a key from your pocket and lock your door, closing it behind you softly. You stuff it back in your pocket as you walk away from the room, hoping that Vriska didn't have a blow torch or something to break down the door. As you came into the living room, you take in the scene in front of you.

Kanaya and Feferi were standing next to Gamzee's fake bar set up as Equius sat there already drinking shots. You heard Gamzee's music playing in the background as you moved your vision cross the room. Tavros sat in a chair while Eridan, Aradia and Sollux sat on a couch. You felt the presence of Vriska and Terezi approaching you from behind so you knew they were there. 8, 9, 10, 11… who was missing? You look around and realize to late who it was.

"Hello Karkitty!" Nepeta says in your face, startling you.

You gave her a glare for her scaring you and for the pet name. She didn't seem to notice. Her face was smiling with the usual grin on it and her hand-paws were on your shoulders. You realized that she had just jumped from the ceiling. You look up, hoping there was no claws marks, and thankfully see none. When you turn your attention back to Nepeta, she's in your face, her face almost exploding from joy.

"Hey, hey, guess what Karkitty? We got ourselves another case!" she squealed.

You give her questioning look and she points to Tavros and Gamzee, and then makes hearts around their figures. You smile a bit.

"Nepeta, you really think…?"

"Yes, I'm pawsitive! Oh, if this goes well I can add it to my shipping wall…"

That was enough for you. When she talked about her shipping wall, you literally felt as if she was a psychotic mess of a fan girl that would never be arrested; which she was. You lightly push her hands of your shoulders and walk away calmly to a chair that was next to Tavros's. As you sit down, you are immediately intrigued by the conversation Sollux and Eridan were having.

"Shut up Sollux. You havve no idea wwhat you're talking about wwhen it comes to wwater. I bet you don't even knoww howw to swwim!"

"Fuck off Eridan! Who careth if I don't know how to thwim? I'm thure I don't!"

As this "conversation" drew on, Aradia kept looking more and more uncomfortable and Tavros started to fall asleep. You look over at Gamzee's bar and are not surprised when you see Vriska and Terezi had joined Equius as he drank down shots like he owned the world. You had to admit, that guy was fucking amazing though. He was like on his twenty somethingth drink now and he was still going. You shook your head. This was going to be a long night.

Just then, someone bumped into the back of your chair.

**Be the someone who bumped into the chair:**

You bump into a chair behind you, only now noticing there was a person in it. "Way to go genius." You say to yourself, ready to apologize to whoever it was. Then you notice who it is. "Nice one Einstein."

As Karkat gets up and spins around, you turn to look at the wall, all of a sudden interested in the texture of it.

"What the fuck Feferi? What was that for?" he shouts while you turn back around to face his glare of doom.

"Wha-le, it wasn't on porpoise…"

He sighs, and silently counts to ten, then looks up. You feel relieved that you were spared of his wrath. For now.

"Sorry Fef, just, not now…" he said, looking worn out already.

You feel a little bad and have an urge to hug him, but you refrain, knowing that it might piss him off some more. As you walk away you bump into a tall figure.

**Be the tall figure:**

"Ah, sorry there Feferi, didn't see you." You say as you ram into the marine-biologist wannabe.

"Ah, no, I'm sorry Gamzee! I'm the one who-"

You wave it off and continue walking, leaving her stuttering in the walkway. You head further back into the kitchen to go retrieve more alcohol. For some reason Vriska had challenged Equius to a shot drinking contest after he had just had his thirty seventh shot. He agreed to the challenge, still sober. So far, they had drunk twenty five since the beginning of the contest, with both parties still awake and ready for more. You shake your head. Equius was like a drinking god. You grab four bottles of vodka, hoping that this was all you needed. Before you head back, you grab two Red Bulls for Nepeta.

As you walk back to your bar, the arguing between Eridan and Sollux had gotten worse. Then, you had an idea. You put down three bottles of vodka and took one with you. You smiled as you thought of the plans effect. This was going to be good.

**Be Sollux:**

"Thith hath nothing to do with her!" You shout at Eridan.

"Sure, sure, land dwweller. Admit it. You're just trying to impress Aradia."

You felt like round-house kicking the guy in the face, but you knew that it would turn into a full blown fight if you did, so you stood your ground.

"Wwhat? Do you havve nothing to say back? Then it must be true~" he purred, smiling at the sight of victory close ahead. You wouldn't have it.

"Hmm, are you thure itth not the other way around? How do I know you're not trying to impreth FF?"

This seemed to get at him. His small smile immediately turned into a sneer.

"That is beside the point Captor, and you knoww it."

"Do I now? I thought you thaid that I wath a thupid land dweller and that I didn't know anything? Am I wrong?"

He stood there infuriated, probably ready to slap you in his sissy ways, but he didn't. Gamzee was already standing between you both, smiling a wide, creepy, clown smile.

**Be Aradia:**

You were kind of tired of their fighting, but you had allowed it to go on, afraid that if you interfered you would be dragged into the argument that had lost its purpose. You honestly can't remember what they had started bickering about to begin with, and it had only got worse when you were mentioned. Though you were happy Sollux had defended you, you wished they would stop. Everyone except for the exceptional few people seemed to notice that they were still fighting, until Gamzee stepped in.

"Yo, my wicked brothers… Why don't you guys stop quarrelling and enjoy the celebratory festivities?"

They stared at him like he was stupid, and Eridan was the first to speak up.

"Get out of this Gamzee, wwe wwere havving a convversation."

"Yeah, some conversation, one that everyone knows about."

You finally look up, and see that mostly everyone was watching the scene unfold. You felt heat rush to your face. You were really embarrassed that you happened to even be mentioned in the fight, but now that you knew everyone was listening… You felt your face turn a bright red at the thought. Sollux saw this and sat down awkwardly next to you, letting you hide your face in his chest.

"Stand back clowwn, I don't need to deal wwith you!" Eridan shouted, getting even Equius's, Vriska's, and Nepeta's attention.

"Whoa, you need to chill your head off Eridan. Come on, why don't you bob for some apples?" Gamzee said, putting a hand on his shoulder.

You look up and see that behind Tavros was a plastic tub filled with water, and you were pretty sure underneath the surface were apples held to the bottom of the tub. Wait, was Tavros sleeping? You sigh. The kid sometimes acted younger than he really was, by a few ten years at least. Nepeta ran over to the tub and dragged it out, putting it on the coffee table in the middle of the room. Gamzee rewarded her with a Red Bull. Oh dear…

**Be Nepeta:**

You are really excited when Gamzee gave you a Red Bull, and you see that he has another one. You plan how to get it while he explains to Eridan that if he was so high and superior, it should be no problem for him to complete a simple task such as bobbing for an apple. Then you see it, Gamzee slowly pouring the vodka into the tub… he was planning on making Eridan drunk! You squeal giddily, knowing what the result would be. Gamzee notices that you see what he's doing and gives you the other Red Bull. Oh, the pure joy you are feeling right now. Two Red Bull cans and watching Eridan get drunk off of bobbing for apples sounded like so much fun! But you had to keep an eye on Gamzee and Tavros…

You walk over to Tavros and poke him. He doesn't wake. Your smile disappears for a second until it comes back. A challenge. You start to count how many times you have to poked him.

"1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7…"

**Be Tavros:**

"58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63… oh, you're finally awake!" You hear Nepeta whisper, as you sleepily rub your eyes.

You look around to see that Eridan was going to bob for apples, and Feferi and Kanaya were standing behind him, saying that they could get all of them in one go.

"Yeah, sure you can Fef, like the last time you tried to collect all the coins on the sea floor last wweek." Eridan says, quite annoyed at his matesprite.

"Wha-le, you sea, that doesn't mean I didn't try…"

"Are you telling me you didn't try your hardest wwhen you said you wwould?"

"Does it matter?" Kanaya interrupted, looking at both of them.

This is when you see that Gamzee had an empty vodka glass… and it was over the bob-the-apple tub… You smile. You knew Gamzee was smart, but this? You shook your head in amazement, looking at Gamzee with a red feeling in you. You stop. Red? Your peripheral vision catches a movement to your left and you see that Nepeta has her covered hands over her face, smiling like a fool. Had she seen right through to your red? You smile weakly, and then put your head back against the chair. Man, were you tired…

**Be Nepeta (again):**

You saw it. Tavros blushed. At Gamzee. You wanted to scream, but you held back your fan-girl moment and stalked out of the room. You had to go tell Karkat. You knew that as soon as Feferi bumped into his chair, he had fled to his room, and you planned on going to tell him. But you stopped.

"Hello Vriska." You pipe, showing your usual smile to her, ignoring the deadly flash go through her eyes. "Were you trying to get into Karkitty's room? You know he'd _never_ let you in!" You said, beaming now.

Her rage seemed to almost overwhelm her when Karkat came from behind her, lightly punching her shoulder.

"Cool it Vriska. I don't want to call a repair man anytime soon. Nepeta, did you want something?" he asked, doing all of this like he was used to the chaos, especially the one going on out in the living room.

But you didn't care. You smiled a wide smile and dragged him back into the hallway he just came from. He was about to protest but decided it was no use. When you finally got the end of the hallway, you almost had a nose bleed with anticipation.

"Tavros feels red for Gamzee! I knew it! This will be a purrfect shipping!"

You saw Karkat hesitate, but then he nodded a little. You gave another excited squeal as you ran off to the living room again, abandoning Karkat.

**Be the abandoned Karkat in the back of the hall:**

This day had to be one of the most bothersome fucking days ever. You sighed. Nepeta was onto Tavros and Gamzee. He thought he should at least warn Gamzee, but seeing as your sad excuse for a friend decided to throw a party at your house without more than a two hour warning, you decided against it. Let him and Tavros suffer from Nepeta. As you walk down the hall for the fourth time, you see Vriska, and oh fuck this does not look good…

**Be Vriska:**

You had almost made it into Karkat's room once. But that was once. And never again had the opportunity come again until now. But you were caught in the act, holding a blow torch to his door knob. He looked at you with newfound anger.

"What, the fuck Vriska? I seriously didn't think you had one of those…" He was still shocked. Good. Maybe you could make your escape...

You make a dash for it, running out of the hallway, out of the living room and out the door, and run. You don't stop running to you find yourself somewhere you barely know. Great. The last thing you remember from the party was seeing Equius give a questioning look…

**Be Equius:**

As Vriska ran out the door, you wondered if she was still going to have that shot contest with you. You guess not. You pick up another shot and drinking it like no problem. 63. You pick up two and drink them both. 64. 65. You didn't feel near drunk and wondered why most people passed out because of it. You look over to see Eridan giving a hissy fit about bobbing for apples (, in which he still hasn't done,) while Feferi tried to be patient with him.

**Be the Eridan having a hissy fit:**

"Do I havve to?"

This is what the arguing had resorted to. You had to not only get all the apples but you also had to apologize to Sollux when you were done. Hm, and you wonder whose brilliant plan that was, hint: Feferi's.

"JUST HIKE UP YOUR FUCKING PANTIES AND DO IT ALREADY ERIDAN!"

You look up to see a mildly pissed off Karkat. Was it your fault? No, probably Vriska, since she practically looked like a robber leaving a house empty handed. Oh wait, she was. You sigh and dunk your head into the water, not even taking a second thought to it. Mistake 1. You try to get an apple. Mistake 2. You realize that you felt slightly… drunk, but you ignore it. Mistake 3. Soon you come up without a single apple. You wipe off your face and plop onto the couch, feeling light headed. There was something off about the water in the tub…

"Fintastic! Now look what happened to him!" you hear Feferi say, her voice seeming to echo in a random void.

"Whoa, who knew how powerful this vodka could be?" That was Gamzee's voice. It was him. That sneaky-

"Oh cod…" you say, your head feeling lighter than it was supposed to be.

Suddenly, you have this weird feeling to vomit. You get up and run to the bathroom, hearing Gamzee's laughter behind you. Once you are sure you're done vomiting, you get out of the bathroom and stagger back to the living room, hoping that you looked better than you felt. Feferi tried to give you a reassuring smile, but you didn't feel any better.

"If it helps, whale vomit is really valuable and rare. The perfume companies use it in their perfume even though it's kind of weird really…"

This makes you laugh a little, but you decide that you need to sit down. You sit down in the chair next to Tavros's and you lean back, feeling like a total idiot for falling for such a simple trick. After what seems like hours, you realize that at least everyone has drunk some sort of Gamzee's alcoholic drinks and most of everybody was drunk. You soon realize that Vriska was back and she was as drunk as ever. You sighed, knowing the following equation was true:

Vriska + alcohol + a party = one fucking huge disaster

You then saw Vriska tumble away from Gamzee's bar and wrap her arm around Aradia. She seemed to tense, but realized quickly that Vriska wasn't going to harm her because of her tipsiness. While Aradia tried to escape the tipsy Vriska, you noticed Sollux standing in front of you.

"Thorry about that Eridan." He said, looking sincere. "Didn't think it would end out that way…"

"It's no problem… just, go awway before I do something stupid…."

You could feel a haze go over your vision, and you see a blurry version of Sollux nod his head and walk away, but not before someone walked over… You feel another wave of haze go over and you feel your consciousness slip farther away… "Oh cod…" you thought, feeling someone's weight sit on the armrest of your chair.

**Be the person sitting on the armrest of the chair:**

You are Aradia Megido, and you're not sure if you should feel sorry for Eridan or think he deserved what he got. You walk over to Eridan after Sollux had just apologized, and see that he was on the verge of becoming really drunk. You sit on the armrest of the chair, and debate on what to do next. But what happens next is _not_ what you expected.

"Hey, Ara…" You hear Eridan's slurred words say.

You look over at him and you feel his hands clasp the sides of you face. Your eyes widen as he pulls you toward him into a kiss. You feel your face heat up as you try to push him away, but that only makes him deepen the kiss and wrap his arms around your waist, bringing you into his lap. You honestly don't know what to make of the situation, so you simply decide to let it take its course. You know Sollux wasn't around, and you definitely know that Eridan wouldn't admit to doing this to you. Ever. But you can tell that even if he was drunk, he would end up waking up the next morning with this burned into his head…

"Oh. My. Gosh…"

You come up from the kiss and turn to the voice. Nepeta…

**Be Nepeta:**

"Meow _this_ is amewsing…" you purr as you see Aradia's face turn into a deeper shade of red, to stunned to move off of Eridan's lap. You giggle as the view in front of you sinks in. You had to tell this to Karkat. You almost squeal in delight as Eridan kissed Aradia on the cheek. You thought it wasn't possible, but her face got redder, and then she finally got up. You pout a bit, now knowing that the show was over. But your smile only grows into a wide grin as you dash off to Karkat's room. When you approach, you notice the door was a little open. Had Vriska successfully gotten in?

You turn your head to the side and peak in, your nose starting to bleed at the sight before you. Karkat was making out with Terezi on his bed; the sheets all messed up and tangled around them. You had never thought of Karkat as a topper, but it would do in this situation. You fan-girl silently to yourself, but you accidently run into the door, making you fall into the room.

Well, this was awkward.

Karkat and Terezi look up at the same time, surprised at your entrance, and immediately start covering up of what you had just witnessed. As Terezi straightened the bed, Karkat glared at you, looking like he was about explode from being so furious. You try to give him an apologetic smile, but it turned into a devious smile.

"What. The. Fuck. Do. You. Fucking. Want?" he said, trying to be calm.

"Well… it's not that important now…"

"You fucking idiot! Tell me what the fuck you want before I fucking blow up on you!"

You flinch, but you keep on your smile.

"I saw Eridan kiss Aradia! On the lips! And the cheek!"

All his anger is replaced by confusion when you say this, and then with annoyance.

"Nepeta, it's probably because he's fucking drunk."

"What? But we have to analyze it first! Don't deny evidence!" You say back, a little louder than intended, making Terezi turn to you.

"Nepeta, why are you so obsessed with pairing people anyways? It's not as fun as Laws, I can tell you that." She says, making an odd face as she said so…

**Be Terezi:**

You had to admit. You were pissed. Nepeta had just burst in randomly at the wrong time, though you were sure she was watching way before she had come in. You finish making the bed and look up to see that Nepeta had slinked off yet again and Karkat was sighing in exhaustion. You can tell that he had a long day. Karkat looked over at you and smiled. You smile back and walk over to him…

**Be Karkat:**

Your girlfriend comes over and smiles at you, and hugs you, sensing that you were stressed. Oh shit, she was so damn cute you couldn't believe she hadn't gone for someone else other than your sorry ass. You hug her back and she rests her head on your chest, both of you smiling happily. That is, until Gamzee comes to the door.

"Bro, we have no more motherfucking alcohol, can you believe that? Not one motherfucking drop left. " he says, not noticing that he had just ruined the moment.

"What the crap Gamzee. I thought you bought ten bottles of vodka and six cases of margarita mix. How are we out?" you say, turning to him.

Just then Equius comes to the door, as sober and healthy as ever.

"Is there more drinks?" He asks simply, as if money appeared out of nowhere to supply for his odd drinking habits. He notices the silence, and adds, "If you guys need more, I can go and get some."

Gamzee turns to him, a little shocked. Were guests allowed to do such things? You and Gamzee both were confused but allowed him to do so.

"Well that went swell." Terezi said sarcastically, shifting her glasses further up her nose.

You smile a little at her comment, but it slowly disappears when you see a diabolical twinkle in Gamzee's eyes…

**Be Gamzee with a diabolical plan:**

You just had a thought. Not something everyone would like, but it was one that you approved of. You walk out of the room and see Sollux standing outside the door.

"Hey Gamzee, what are you doing?"

"Hmm? Nothing much motherfucker. Where's your girlfriend?"

"Oh, um, I don't- oh, hey Tavros!"

Just then, Tavros walks into the hallway, rubbing his right eye from just waking up. You flush a little, seeing him in a vulnerable state, but you keep your smile plastered on your face. He almost runs into you, and looks up sleepily, a questioning look on his face.

"Hey Gamzee, do you know a place where I can sleep? I'm kind of getting tired…"

You see him start to close his eyes. You panicked a little, catching ahold of his shoulders, shaking him a bit in the process.

"Don't fall asleep standing in the middle of the hallway dude, come on, the guest bedroom is this way." You say, guiding him by the shoulders further down the hall way. You hope Sollux didn't see how badly you were flushing, and thanks to the hall being so dark, he probably didn't. You felt your smile become wider and your face more heated as you thought of your plan…

**Be Sollux standing in the hall:**

You weren't sure, but you were sure you had seen Gamzee blush at the sight of Tavros. But who could tell, the hallway was so dark, it might have just been your imagination. You start to walk back to the living room when Eridan walks right into you. You look up and see that, yes, he was now sober… you think.

"Ah, there you are Sollux." He said smiling.

You are confused on why he is smiling, but you nod your head, gesturing him to get on to what he was going to say.

"Ok, I knoww this might be a little awwkwward, but I have to admit that Aradia is hot."

This stuns you. "What did you thay?"

"I said that Aradia wwas hot."

You stare at him shocked, wondering if he was still drunk. It made you feel better knowing your girlfriend was being complimented, but what the crap? Then he leaned forward so that you only could hear his next sentence.

"Hey, I havve a suggestion. Wwhy don't you, I, and Aradia havve a threesome?"

This makes you flush, and you immediately shake your head.

"Never! Are you thure your thtill not drunk? I mean, that'th ith a little, I don't know, uh, weird to want to have thex with your friend and hith grilfriend?"

This only causes Eridan to give you a sad face before his creepy smile returns.

"Wwho said anything about sex Sollux?"

You gulp down the lump that had formed in your throat. You could tell Eridan would not drop the subject until he got what he wanted. You slowly nod your head yes, which earned you a really scary chuckle from Eridan

"God help him remember hith thanity thoon…" you pray silently, hoping that what was about to happen wouldn't get too far.

"Noww let's go find your girlfriend…" Eridan said smiling, grabbing your arm and dragging you out into the living room.

**Be the totally-not-drunk-even-though-your-way passed-normal-human-capacity-of-drinking Equius:**

As you're shopping at the store, you wonder what type of vodka Gamzee had bought. As you were walking down an aisle, you run into someone. You look down at them as they get back up, bothering to not help because you know you might hurt them in some way. When they get up, you look at their name tag: Jade.

"Oh, sorry about that! I didn't know I was in the way! So, are you looking for something?"

God this lady was annoying already. She had puppies and rainbows spouting out of her like waterfalls and you could feel her happiness and joy oozing off of her in tons. You decide it was worth going through for some alcohol.

"Uh, yeah, some vodka..."

"Oh! What type of vodka? Russian is said to be the best! Oh, wait, I think I've seen you somewhere… wait! Don't tell me, I'll get it…"

That was enough. You turn around and walk out of the store, leaving her standing there thinking out loud to herself.

**Be Kanaya:**

Now, you weren't completely sure if you were drunk yet, but since you couldn't tell, you assumed you were.

"Come on Kanaya, only one more to go!" Feferi cheered behind you.

You sighed, but took in a deep breath and dunked your head back underwater. Well, under some form of water/vodka/Nepeta's Red Bull. You were intoxicated by the smell as it was, but putting your head into the iced up liquid form of it was even worse. Or better, depending on your point of view. You bite the last apple and bring it to the surface, and spit to the floor, raising your arms like a champion who just finished a 25 km race. But without the smell of sweat.

"You're fin-ally done!" Feferi said, dancing like the drunken person she was at the moment. How she managed to keep up her fish puns, you would never know, but you were happy that you finished the task. You plopped down onto the abandoned couch and breathed in some air. Man it was good to breath… or was it? You shrugged your shoulders, and all the while feel like something was going to happen… something very important…

**Be Equius (again):**

You walk into the next store, this one a little smaller, but with a better lighting. You went to the nearest manager to ask were the vodka was when you suddenly stopped. There was no way…

"Oh, hiya! See, I must know you! I was thinking back on it-" Jade was talking none stop, her smile still extremely too happy to be a person working on a late shift. "-and you go to high school right? So I was thinking that you might be- oh wait! Where are you going?"

You didn't care what people thought it looked like, but you ran straight out of there. How had she found you? And why the crap was she the only obstacle in front of you and alcoholic relief? You had those questions to answer and the newest one: Where else can you get vodka?

**Be Karkat:**

You were picking up crap off kitchen floor with Terezi while Nepeta was wiping down the counters. You looked up when you heard her squeal.

"OH. My. GOSH! Look at all these Red Bulls!"

Shit. You were screwed now.

"Now Nepeta, I don't think you should-"

"I shouldn't what? Drink them all? That's _exactly _what I'm going to do!" she said, laughing evilly.

She opened one, despite Terezi and yours protests, and chugged it down in one go. Both of your faces were drained of all color. Terezi backed out of the kitchen quietly while you tried to find something to protect you from what was about to happen. But to no avail. You looked up and panicked. She opened a second one. As she was chugging that one down too as you ran right after Terezi, looking for somewhere to hide from the about-to-become-overloaded-tank-full-of-caffeine Nepeta. You dragged Kanaya, Feferi and Vriska out of the living room and dragged them all into your room. As you closed the door behind you, you realized you should at least warn the others.

"Terezi, you're in charge of my room until I get back, and Vriska. Don't. Do. Anything." You emphasized the last words and ran out of the room, leaving Terezi with the half-sober group of idiots.

Smart move you asshole, you thought to yourself.

You run down the hall way and open the guest bedroom door. And saw one of the least expected things that day. You saw Gamzee smiling like a fool and Tavros was lying on the bed, his shirt was off and he was panting and sweating. Why? You didn't want to know, but knew the answer anyways. And then you asked a stupid question.

"Gamzee, did you really just make out with Tavros?"

Gamzee's smile grew wider and he nodded, the white on his face dripping off with his sweat. Tavros apparently decided he was too tired to stay conscious and drifted off to sleep. Then you remembered.

"Hey, uh, that was weird and all, but lock the door next time, oh, and now. Now would be a good time too."

Gamzee gave you a confused look and then noticed the eerie silence that had come from the kitchen.

"Did she find the-"

"Yes, yes she did. She found the Red Bull, now I have to go tell the others-"

"Got it."

You look at Gamzee, and realize he already had his phone in his hand, texting the situation out. As you closed and locked the door behind you, he was checking off Aradia, Eridan, Equius and Sollux for a mass sent out text. You wait a few minutes and then hear a phone going off. Then two. Then Three. You guessed Equius hadn't come back yet. Then you heard running to a door and a lock being turned. You sighed.

"Well, at least we all have a door to protect us all."

"Not for long if we keep talking."

Then everything was silent except for the sinister laughter that came from the kitchen…

**Be Equius (again…?):**

Your phone starts to buzz, so you take it out of your pocket. You look at the text and wonder if the world was ending today:

From: terminallyCapricious

NePeTa FoUnD tHe ReD bUlL. hIdE yOuR mOtHeRfUcKiNg AsSeS sO tHaT sHe DoEsN't FiNd yOu.

Well, that was comforting.

You walked into the final store you knew had any alcohol whatsoever. You walk to the back, get some vodka, and set it on the counter near the cash register. The employee behind the counter was humming a tune that was vaguely familiar and turned around to get your stuff. No. Fucking. Way.

"Oh my! Isn't this coincidence? I've met you three times in the past few hours, and look! You're still getting vodka! My, you must really love- oh yeah! I remember now, your name was-"

"OHMYFUCKINGGODLADYWHYAREYOUFOLLOWINGME?"

That stopped her, but she didn't seem offended by your language. She just kept smiling with her magical kitten crap, looking amused.

"Silly, don't you know? I work night shift every weekend!"

"How would I know that? I don't even know you!"

Her smile widened at her next statement.

"What? You don't remember me? I was your math teacher two years ago Equius!"

Your jaw dropped, and you tried to recall if you even did well in math. But then you realized that you just yelled at a teacher more importantly. You apologize, but she tells you that it's fine, and everyone makes mistakes. Like how she used to tell you every time you missed an equation or function. Wow that was creepy. You bought the vodka and walked out, still dazed about the meeting. Were you even in school two years ago?

**Be Nepeta:**

Everyone was gone. Why? You don't know. But you felt like bouncing off the walls. Literally. You let out a laugh at the mental image, but quickly stopped. No one told you that everyone was playing hide-and-go-seek and that you were it. You smiled. You were going to win. And you had a feeling that everyone else knew it too.

**Be Terezi:**

You were trying to get Feferi and Vriska to stop singing beer songs while Kanaya laid on Karkat's bed and stared at the ceiling, lost in her own thoughts.

"Please both of you. Stop it! If Nepeta finds us-" you stopped there.

You didn't want to think of what would happen, but you figured it wouldn't be good. Then you heard someone else singing.

"Come out, come out, where ever mew are~"

You were completely still, and even Feferi and Vriska knew something was off. You gathered them on the bed and turned off the light, and watched the shadows underneath the door intently. Then you saw her shadow.

"I'll find you no matter what my kittens!" she purred, and you could imagine her giving a crazy look at anyone who dared to look at her then.

You heard her put her hand on the door knob, and started turning it slowly. Then, the doorbell rang.

**Be the person at the door:**

"Who is it?" someone called from inside. You rolled your eyes.

"The pizza man."

"What? Really?"

"No."

There was silence, and then the person on the inside opened the door. God, Gamzee was right. Nepeta looked like she had gotten into a giant stash of sugar and stuffed it all into her mouth at the same time. For those who can think of the effect, times the imagined effect by four hundred, and that was Nepeta now. You look around the living room. Nobody. Figures. Nepeta couldn't come close to scratching you even if she wanted to, so you were cool with hanging out here babysitting her for a while. As you put the vodka in the pantry, you see the Red Bull cans littered around the kitchen floor. You count seven in total, and you know that previously she had had two. That means she had nine, not including the one she was holding tightly to her chest like it was a precious gem.

"Hey, Nepeta, what are you going to do now that no one is here?" you ask, not used to the silence.

"Oh, they're here alright Equius, they're just hiding. I _will_ find them, and I _will_ win…"

She said that all in a crazy like manner, making you concerned for her health just a bit. Then it hit you.

"Hey Nepeta, come here really quick."

"Ah, no, I must find them meow."

"Nepeta…"

"…okay, what do you want?"

You signaled her to follow as you lead her to the back of the pantry, this one a walk-in one though, and stop right in front of the back shelf.

"…and? What do you want?" Nepeta asked, her body beginning to shake from the sugar rush.

You motion her to wait and you walk out, close the door, and lock it. It takes her a moment, but then she realizes that you just trapped her in a pantry. Not just any pantry. It was the pantry without the Red Bull, the pantry without the vodka, but the pantry with the vegetables and fruit. You smiled. Things were finally going your way.

**Be Vriska:**

You came out of dizziness in a dark room on a plushy bed. A girl's bed maybe? You try to recall what had happened but only remembered Nepeta turning into a hyped-up sugar machine off of Red Bull and singing in a creepy voice that she's going find you all. You also remember vaguely that you were thrown into Karkat's room with Feferi, Kanaya and Terezi. Wait. Karkat's room… You smiled as your hand searched for the lamp by his bedside. You found it and turned it on. His room was normal, and not as you had expected.

Despite the whap in the head from Feferi and Terezi hissing at you that you were an idiot, you still couldn't believe you had made it into his room. It was nothing special, even though you had worked so hard to get into it. You should have chosen a more interesting room to try to sneak into, but unfortunately, it turned out to be just a plain, generic grey room.

"This sucks." You say out loud, now noticing that your voice was hoarse.

"You just now noticed that?" Kanaya responded, looking up at the ceiling.

"Yeah, I guess I did…" you say slowly, trying to get your voice back into working order. "I guess I did…"


	2. Chapter 2

Your name is Karkat Vantas, and you just realized your mistake.

"Crap!"

Gamzee looked over at you, exhaustion taking over his features.

"Bro, what's motherfucking wrong?"

"I've got to go get Terezi, see ya." You say abruptly, standing up and walking to the door in one swift motion.

"Hmm? Oh, that's right. Didn't you throw a drunk Feferi and Vriska in your room with her? Man, you're dense."

"Tch, at least Kanaya is there as well."

"Hey, who is to say she can't get motherfucking cranky?"

You sigh, but open the door, knowing full well you could bump into Nepeta and her creepy singing voice that was now… yelling? You drift out of the hall and into the kitchen, where, sure enough, she was trapped in the second pantry. You look at Equius, who was currently chilling on the couch with a bottle of vodka half downed, watching some dumb TV show.

"Did you lock her in there?" you ask him.

"Mhm."

"And you got more vodka?"

"Mhm."

What the…? This guy was really something else, you thought as you shook your head in disbelief. You walked back to your room and open it to see that Vriska was poking through your stuff.

"Vriska!"

"Don't you have anything interesting in here? Like a diary or something?" She said while looking up with an annoyed look on her face.

"Huh? What, no! Who has that type of crap? Now get the fuck out of my room!" you say in an almost yell, which helped in the process waking Feferi from her half-drunk state.

As Feferi stumbled off the bed, Kanaya followed suit, grabbing Feferi's shoulders so that she wouldn't fall into anything. Vriska whooshed pass you grumbling something about being boring and nothing interesting whatsoever, while Kanaya led Feferi out of the room, her face showing no emotion as they left. You looked around and see that your room wasn't as bad as you had expected. A few drawers were open but nothing to majorly bad was hanging out. Only a few t-shirts were thrown about and some things on your desk were misplaced, but you could fix that. You started making your bed, wondering if the night would be over soon when your eyes fell one your clock. 01:28.

"Well, good morning." You said to no one in particular.

"Yeah, good morning Karkat."

You look over the Terezi, who was practically falling asleep while sitting up on your bed. You flushed at how beautiful she was when she was tired, and sat next to her. She smiles tiredly as you took ahold of her hand…

**Be the extremely tired Terezi:**

"You look tired." Karkat commented as he squeezed your hand.

"Thank you Sherlock, because I couldn't figure out myself." You say back sarcastically, leaning your head on his shoulder for some support.

He chuckles a little at your comment then looks at you, his face a bright cherry red. He plants a kiss on your lips, which at least made you more awake. You blush a little and hug him in response. By 01:47 both of you are practically dozing off. So, being the awesome boyfriend he is, Karkat lays you down and gets a blanket. When he comes back, he lays next you and wraps the blanket around the both of you, and he even let you curl up into him while the both of you drift off to sleep. Before you shut off from the world, you hear Sollux yelling… again. 'I wonder what it's about now…' was your last thought before the room went from grey to black.

**Be Sollux:**

"You are thick Eridan, abtholutely thick!" you say, standing up next to the bed.

"Nope! Not at all!" he says back in a sing-song voice, his arms wrapped around Aradia.

"Thtop hugging Aradia! That'th ith thick too!"

"Oh, you're jealous noww?"

Now he put his arms around her waist. You were sick of him hitting on your girlfriend; absolutely sick of it. You looked at Aradia as she tried to cover her face with a pillow, but failed miserably considering she was sitting on it. A minute ago, everything had been completely fine until Eridan had lick inside Aradia's ear, which was _very_ appalling. Then he proceeded to say that he did nothing wrong, which was incorrect. Or, _offensive_, as Karkat's older brother would say. You knew you had to do something, but what? What would throw off a complete idiot that was drunk? You don't know many good options, but you could always blame your actions on being drunk, and you can only think of one way to throw him off guard.

"AA, clothe your eyeth for a minute, and don't open them until I thay, ok?"

She nodded and closed her eyes, a questioning look on her face as she proceeded with those actions. 'Well, here goeth nothing.'

You snag Eridan's scarf and yank him towards yourself. You're already starting to regret the actions you will commit. You then take the bastard's face between your hands and kiss him. Lip to lip. Yup, you will regret this till the day you die. Maybe even in the afterlife.

But of course Eridan, being the stupid and drunk fag he was, wrapped his arms around you waist and pulled you into a deeper kiss, which, even you had to admit, he was a damn good kisser. You try to escape, but only succeed in making him chuckle like a fool when you grunt.

"Can I open my eyes now?" Aradia asks, aware that there was no one near her now, and kind of missing the warmth.

You push away from Eridan enough so that you can say a barely audible 'no!'

She scrunches her face, curiosity starting to take over her better judgment. "Then when?" You can tell she wants to know what's taking place now, but you don't want her to see you this way, _especially_ this way. You push Eridan onto the bed with all you strength, which resulted with him landing in front of Aradia, who bounced off her pillows and landed on him, forming themselves into a cross-like shape. You face palm. Great job you fucking retard. You just made the problem worse.

You sort of wish you could just walk away and let problem solve itself, but you knew that would result in disaster. You try to think of a way to solve this whole dilemma, but of course the drunken guy is always the first to act. You watch in embarrassment as Eridan pulled himself into a sitting position and half moved half dragged Aradia into a cradle position in his lap. She gives you desperate glance before Eridan bent down and kissed her on the forehead. You felt yourself blush madly but you managed to snarl, causing him to look up. Then his face brightens up.

"Oh, I havve an idea! Let's play keep awway!"

"Wha-?"

Before you can react, Eridan picked up Aradia bridal style and jumped off the bed. You gaped after him as he ran off out of the room and into the hall way. What the _fuck_ were you going to do about this? You shook your head and ran after him. The house wasn't that big, you were sure you could corner him in the kitchen or something. But oddly enough Equius beat you to him.

"Eridan, this is not how you should be acting. Someone of your caliber should not be playing such childish games."

"Oh please Eq, that is hardly the problem right noww."

"No Eridan that is the problem. I am utterly disappointed in your actions. Now, you should hand over Aradia before she gets hurt-"

"Eq, you think I wwould hand something ovver just because you wwanted me to; besides, wwe all knoww you havve a thing for Ara, so there is no need to hide it."

"Well- I- uh… I need a towel…"

You face palmed just watching this conversation. Equius went to look for a towel while Eridan stood there not knowing where to go next. You took a glance at the clock. 2:01. You sigh, which caught Eridan's attention.

"Oh! Hi Sol! So you'll play the game right?"

"I don't really have a choice now do I?"

"Wwell, you do, but they're just not vvery good ones." He said, smiling evilly.

Equius returned with his towel and tried to continue the previous conversation he had had with Eridan.

"Now Eridan, that was very rude to bring up the p-AST!" Then, Equius tripped.

When he tripped, he ran into Eridan, which resulted in both of them falling along with Aradia, who thankfully had enough sense to jump out of Eridan's arms before they all crashed down to the ground. When Aradia landed, she accidently hit the tub filled of the dangerous concoction of alcohol and caffeine. It fell over and spilled all over and onto the others in the living room, which snapped Eridan out of his drunkenness.

"Wwhat the hell Ara? Wwhat wwas that for?"

"Ah! I'm so sorry! Here, I'll go get some towels-" and with that, she ran out of the living room and to the hallway closet. You were so relieved that she was out of Eridan's clutches that you almost didn't realize that Feferi was trying to hold back her giggles at her soaking matesprit. She was trying not to burst into laughter while Kanaya was successful in holding herself back, but Vriska broke the tension.

Between her fits of laughter Vriska insulted Eridan about how dumb he looked, and all the while slapping Equius's back multiple times from her moments of hysteria. After her little scene, she started to hiccup and Kanaya went to get her a glass of water. You stood there like a retard, unknowing of what to do next. When Aradia returned with towels, she gave you a warm smile. You smiled back, feeling better about, well, everything. She went and handed Equius a new towel, who excepted graciously and a bit flushed. She then gave one to Feferi, Vriska and Eridan, who all thanked her. When Kanaya returned she was given a towel too. After the towels were distributed, Aradia got the cleaning supplies from underneath the kitchen counters to clean up the toxins in the carpet.

You went over to help her, and noticed that the pantry door was banging. You wonder for a bit what could be in there...

**Be the thing in the pantry:**

You are Nepeta Leijon, and you are not a happy person. You were trapped in a pantry full of vegetables and some canned fruit. You were also separated from your precious Red Bull, which was a crime in itself. You had to report these wrong doings to Terezi as soon as you got out of here, but the door was locked. Curse your moirail for thinking this was for your own safety or whatever the reason you were locked in here for, but it does _not _mean you need to be separated from the Red Bull. _Never_.

You were about to try to destroy the door again when you felt your pocket buzz. Oh yeah, you forgot your phone was in your pocket. You look at the text and you almost cackle at the evil plan that just formed in your mind. You text back and send it, while you sit there and wait for your evil plan to activate. All you have to do is make sure the party doesn't end…

You then pull up you Trollian account and contact the person you knew could keep everyone there, regardless of how much you disliked her…

**Be the person Nepeta just started trolling:**

You finish drinking your water when you feel you phone vibrate. You roll your eyes, thinking you're going to see a text from your mom, but you quickly take out you phone nonetheless and walk a bit away from the living room. To your surprise someone on Trollian is trolling you. You attitude quickly changes. What was this?

**- arsenicCatnip [AC] started trolling arachnidsGrip [AG] - **

AC: :33 okay I know this is unexpected, but I n33d to ask you fur a favor.

AG: Do go on.

AC: :33 Well it's simple really, just keep the party going until 10:00 tonight alright?

AG: W8te, why?

AC: :33 Long story.

AG: What are you planning Nepeta? And where are you?

AC: :33 Those are both long stories too.

AG: Uuuuuuuugh, you are so frustur8ting sometimes!

AC: :33 I'll explain later, but right now I have stuff to do.

AG: That is very dou8tful. You are nowhere in sight and there is still Red 8ull in the pantry... are you stuck somewhere?

AC: :33 Agh! Don't remind me of the purrfect substance!

AG: Aha! You are stuck somewhere, 8ut my question is do you want to st8y there?

AC: :33 NO! I WANT TO GET OUT!

AG: Ooooooooh, looks like I have to go Nepeta, 8ut I'll find you l8ter!

AC: :33 NO!

AG: Don't worry, I'll keep them here. All of them. :::;)

**- arachnidGrip [AG] ceased trolling arsenicCatnip [AC] -**

You smile. So all you had to do was keep everyone here for what, another eighteen to twenty hours maybe? Piece of cake.

You walk up to Kanaya and swing your arm around her to have it rest on her shoulders. She gives a questioning look, and you smile in response.

**Be Kanaya:**

"Would you like another glass of water Vriska?" you ask politely, hoping that whatever she was planning did not involve you.

"That sounds great and all, but I want something else. I need something to keep everyone here for, oh, I don't know, the rest of today, and I was thinking, 'Hey, who is smart and could think of something entertaining for the next few dreadful hours?' That's right Kanaya, that person is you! And I know you're not one for having fun, but my plan will get you, and everyone else, to loosen up and stay awhile longer!"

"Vriska, that sounds great and all, but have you even approved this with Karkat? This is his place after all."

She pauses to think and then runs to Karkat's room. She returns seconds later, a wide smile on her face. You raise an eyebrow, knowing that she was either going to lie or avoid giving you the answer.

"Well you see Kanaya, Karkat and his girlfriend are sleeping, and considering that I _certainly_ do not have the _heart_ to wake them up, I would like to ask you what Karkat would think."

"I think Karkat would not approve of whatever you-"

"Great! That's all I need to know! So, now that that is all said and done, will you help out a friend?"

You sigh, knowing it would come to this. Just because you had a soft spot for her didn't mean you would break down that easily. Well, you hoped at least. You also know that you had impaired thinking because of the apple bobbing thing, but your answer to her suggestion just came out, surprising the both of you.

"Fine, but if I do help you, you have to promise me some of your time on _anything_ I want."

She gives you a shocked look, her face a bit flushed, and you feel as if you should have the same look, but you don't. Instead you feel your face have an evil smile carved into it with suggestive eyebrows raised. You get the feeling that this has made Vriska very intimidated or very seduced… wait, why can't it be both? Either way, she nodded her head in a silent agreement to you condition. Her smile returned to her face when she turned you away from everyone in the living room and walked you to the kitchen, her arm still wrapped around you.

"Okay, this plan has to be foolproof or else it's going to crumble to the ground. Now keep in mind, we're trying to keep everyone here for the next eighteen hours or so, so if you have anything that can keep someone entertained for hours on end, tell me now."

You think if you had anything like that, but you shake your head. You were about to say that Vriska could just lock them all inside, until you thought of something that would mildly entertain everyone, even yourself.

"Okay, Vriska, I have an idea." You whisper to her.

She nods her head and you proceed to tell her your plan.

**Be someone else:**

You are now someone else, and you just got invited to a party. You are extremely happy because it has been _so_ long since a party has been held. You had gotten the text early this morning but it didn't matter, they just told you where it was at and what time to be there. They also said that you could invite all the people that you wanted because why not?

You climbed out of your bed and fell to the floor. Now it may sound strange, but yes, you wanted to fall to the floor. You stretched out on the floor because, yes, you were that lazy. You then proceeded to pull yourself up by your bed and grab your phone off the nightstand table.

You flip open your phone and the brightness momentarily blinds you but your eyes adjust quickly to the light. You type out the invite and click the boxes of your friends you want to come. It comes out as a total of thirty three, so you narrow it down to eleven. You send the text message, not caring how early it was, and you got ready for the day ahead.

**Be someone else:**

You were already someone else, so you cannot do it again this chapter, but if you'd like to get back to the story, then I'll start you back off with being Kanaya…

**Be Kanaya:**

Once you had explained your plan to Vriska, she had an approving smile on her face. You feel relief wash through you knowing that she approves of it. It's not her style of executing things, but what you had in mind was going to keep everyone there whether they liked it or not, and she liked that.

"I didn't know you were so devious Kanaya. I have to admit that even _I'm_ impressed of what you've thought of." Vriska commented, looking over at you as you both walked toward your car.

"Do you think it'll work though?"

She pauses for a little while then nods.

"It will definitely work, and if Karkat _does_ wake up, he won't be able to stop what has already happened."

You both chuckle at this, despite how correct it is. As you open the trunk, Vriska got the containers in the back holding all of your supplies. Not only was this stuff crucial to keeping everyone at Karkat's house, but it was also going to be great practice for you and your techniques. When both of you enter the house with all of your stuff, no one paid you any mind. You decide to set up shop with your equipment right next to the sad-excuse-for-a-bar-run-by-a-clown-who-is-current ly-at-an-unknown-area-of-this-house.

Vriska got up and went to the bathroom while you proceeded to unpack. You looked up to see three things. One, the time, 2:47. Two, Feferi and Eridan were setting up the apple tub… again. Three, Sollux and Aradia were done cleaning. You nodded in approval to no one in particular. It was nice to see that a fight hadn't broken out in the past hour and a half. It was almost relaxing being with your friends if they were always like this, but unfortunately, not everyone got along when you wanted them to.

You were done setting up shop in ten minutes, and no one had left yet. Vriska was back now, and you needed a victim. It may sound weird, but yes, you needed one, and you were planning on grabbing the first person who walked by, regardless of who they were. What seemed like hours of waiting was only two minutes when someone finally walked by. You grab their wrist gently but firmly as you spoke to them.

"I'm sorry, but if you don't terribly mind, I would like to try something out."

**Be the person Kanaya just grabbed:**

You are now Eridan Ampora, and you were just about to leave. Yeah, you know, leaving without telling anyone is sneaky and blah blah blah. But so what? You remembered what you did, and you didn't want to encounter anyone that might bring it up, but now you're trapped… by Vriska and Kanaya. Now Vriska you could deal with, but Kanaya was scarier than she looked.

Even though she was widely considered the most likely to become a fashion model and such, she once chased you around the neighborhood as a masked murder with a chainsaw on Halloween. You had no chance; you were a wizard that year! Oh, but you weren't the only one chased; she chased Gamzee too, and like every year before he was a clown, so he also had no chance. Only you, Gamzee, and Vriska had witnessed her mad skills with the chainsaw, but no one spoke about that night. Not even Kanaya.

You were now terrified, because you hadn't talked to her directly after the incident, and you were afraid of what would happened if you did. Oh, wait, did you mention that the chainsaw was real?

You look over at Kanaya, who was currently holding on to your wrist. She stood up and gave you a sweet smile.

"I'm sorry, but if you don't terribly mind, I would like to try something out."

Oh shit, you were dead now. Her chainsaw wasn't in sight, but you had the feeling this would be worse than being cut in half with the cursed thing. You try slipping out of her grip, but you succeed in giving her an excuse to tighten her grip. You wince at how strong she is. Probably because of how often she uses her chainsaw.

"Noww Kanaya, I wwas just about to leavve-"

"Ah, now you see, no one is allowed to leave Eridan." Vriska said from behind you, putting her hands on your shoulders.

Oh fuck, they were tag teaming. The end of the world was coming near.

"Hey, but wwhy me? I did nothin wwrong-"

"You were about to do something wrong, therefore we must make an example of you to everyone else who wants to leave. You understand right?" It was Kanaya this time, and she was really close to your face. You think about spitting in her face when you remember the months of nightmares you had had after that Halloween.

"Fine, but make it quick." You mumble.

They both smile evilly and you know you're in for it. You look around and make eye contact with Feferi.

**Be Feferi:**

You have no idea what Eridan was doing, but it looked exciting! You wanted to do what he was doing once Kanaya and Vriska were done with him. You then turned you attention to the other people in the room. Equius was snoring softly on the couch and Aradia and Sollux were talking. You didn't want to bother Equius, so you bounced over and hugged Sollux from behind.

Now, you knew you were drunk, but you must have been extremely drunk if all you did was sit in the back of your consciousness and watch the show go on. Which you did, but so what? It was fun to watch!

"Wha-? What FF? I wath jutht talking to AA here and you jutht-"

You then went along with what you felt like, which happened to be happy, and people are always happy when they kiss people. So you kissed Sollux. When you watched this from the back of your mind, you didn't know if you should feel bad for Aradia for feel happy for yourself. You had wanted to do that for some time now, but you would never let yourself do that, especially since he and Aradia were going out. You thought kissing him would be exciting and happy, but it was more of regret than anything. Poor Aradia, and you did that right in front of her too. You look over and smile, trying to make it seem apologetic, but all you get is a shocked stare. You decide that right then and there was a good time to jump up on the coffee table. Why? You don't know, it just felt like the right thing to do at the time. Now, what, may you ask, were you going to do now? You could always dance like an idiot, but what was the fun in that? If you were going to do something, it had to be with other people, because it's always more exciting that way! You proceed to drag Sollux up to the table with you and you start to spin him in circles.

Everything around you was a blur to begin with, but now that you were spinning it got even worse. You let go of Sollux's hands, flinging him and yourself in opposite directions, you landing in an extra chair and him getting flung into the wall. His impact made a loud thud that resonated throughout the house, making everyone go silent.

"Um, Sollux, are you okay?" Aradia asked, slowly walking over to where he had landed.

He groaned and pushed himself into a sitting position. Aradia picked up her pace and was soon next to Sollux's side, making sure not to touch him. You couldn't help but giggle. Okay, well your drunken half giggled, but your other half felt really bad. Like, EXTREMELY bad. You wanted to walk over and apologize, but you couldn't take control of your body. You panicked, now knowing why Aradia and Sollux didn't drink; because _this_ is what happened. You became the backseat passenger to a slow moving car crash, and there was nothing you could do about it but sit and watch it all happen.

You felt this sweep of energy overcome you and then it was quickly replaced by drowsiness. You regret ever trying that apple bobbing game, whoever made up the idea of getting people drunk on that must be a psycho or something. You tried to get up, but ended up falling back into your chair, laughing like a maniac about the fact that you couldn't stand.

Sollux rubbed his head and got up, mumbling that he was okay. Aradia lead him into the hallway and out of your view. You look up when you see a shadow come over vision. You look up to see Equius's concerned face.

"Hey-ya Equius! How are ya doin'?" your drunken half says, oblivious to the fact that you made a total idiot of yourself.

"Um, I was wondering if you might be okay, Feferi. You seem, um, how do I put this... Well, drunk." He said, now sweating intensely.

You laugh at him over the concern and you are afraid that your laughing reply might have made him worry some more.

"Oh nonsense! I'm fine! I can't stand is all!"

"Uh, but isn't that a bad thing?"

"Huh? Oh no, it's fine, as long as I have a way around I don't need to worry!"

_Oh glub no._

"Oh, and might what that be?"

_Oh please glubbing no._

"Well, I can always get someone to carry me."

You feel like smacking your drunken half in the face. You were starting to sound like your mom! You know for sure that if she saw this happening she would have mixed feelings between happiness and confusion.

"Equius, do you have anything else to do?" You ask, your voice turning menacing.

He looked at you in confusion, and then started to sweat profusely.

"Um, no, but, I uh-"

You pull him down by his shirt collar until your face was level with his. "Do you or do you not?"

"Uh, no, ma'am."

You feel a smile creep across your face that you wanted to vanish. It was the menacing smile that your mom would give you and your sister every time you gave a bad excuse for something. It was the smile that said, I-knew-it-all-along; the one that made you shiver and want to shrink into the core of your being; the one every military officer would flinch at. It was on your face, and you wanted it gone.

You remembered the first time your sister and yourself had first witnessed this smile. Regardless of the fact that you were three and she was nine, it happened. That event traumatized you, causing you to have nightmares for twelve days. They were horrible, and the dream was always the same, despite of how many times you tried to change it. You would be running in a city, away from some looming threat. No matter how many routes you took, in the end, you always died.

Now, mind you, your mother was quite a loving woman, she just never liked showing it. Ever since she retired from the army as a supreme commander and general, she had been that way. There was a few times, though, where she would completely break down and would be the most loving person in the world. She would pull you and you sister into a group hug and tell you two how much she loved you and about how she didn't mean anything she had said to you both in the past. This happened at least once every three and a half years. Honestly, you looked forward to the week or two that she broke down. But enough of that, back to what you're doing right now.

You were now, somehow, currently standing. You were also menacingly glaring and smiling at Equius, who, by the way, was sweating bullets like he needed to give ammunition to an army base pronto. You are tired of being you, if you know what you mean. So you decide to be someone more interesting.

**Be the more interesting person:**

You are the more interesting person, which is hard to be considering before you were the daughter of a retired supreme commander and general. Now you were just some person walking home.

But you are now the more interesting person.

For now.

You had met someone earlier that you are sure that you knew. After they had ran off, probably because they had to get somewhere, you remembered that you had never had a teaching degree. Let alone even gone to college. You were in high school. Plus, who would want to be a teacher? You also remember that you don't like math. You wonder why, but then you also remembered that it was because of that awkward tall guy that you remembered such stuff. Oh, the day and the things it brings you.

Your phone rings a cheery tune in your purse and you smile. You wonder who it could be. You pull it out of your purse and look at the screen.

**- turntechGodhead [TG] started to pester gardenGnositc [GG] -**

TT: hey

TT: yo jade

TT: i was wondering if you caught wind of a party going down

TT: if not you should reply so that i can get the info

You smile gets wider. You type furiously on your phone, hoping that he was still on Pesterchum.

GG: hey dave!

GG: there have been a lot of parties going on lately!

GG: the good news is that im off for the weekend so im sure I can go!

TT: oh

TT: there you are

TT: where did you disappear to this time?

GG: work :|

TT: ah that makes sense

GG: yeah

GG: so are you going to give out the info for the party?

TT: heh yeah

TT: might as well

TT: we are all going to have such a fucking blast that even the mayans will be jealous that their end of the world thing wasn't like our fucking bomb of a party

TT: they will watch in awe at our amazingness and pure irony of life

TT: they will regret disappearing off the face of earth because they are flipping missing this epic party of awesome and sweet people

GG: -_-

GG: the info dave

TT: oh right

TT: the only thing you need to do is go home get in new clothes and ill pick you up

GG: huh?

GG: but my clothes are fine!

TT: no

TT: theyre not

TT: you cant wear work clothes to a party

TT: that is just unheard of

GG: D:

GG: ok fine

GG: ill get home as quick as possible

GG: oh! should it be just casual or what?

TT: nothing much

TT: casual should do the trick if you want specifics

GG: ok!

GG: see you soon dave!

**- gardenGnostic [GG] has ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] -**

You were so pumped about this party now! You were also pumped that you were no longer the more interesting person; you were Jade Harley, full-time part-time grocer clerk/assistant at almost every mini mart in town. But that is none of anyone's' concern.

Skip to the more interesting person?

**== Yes?**

**== No?**

You select yes.

**Be the more interesting person (again):**

You are more interesting than Jade Harley, full-time part-time extraordinaire, even though both of you are going to a party; but that is beside the point. The difference with you is that you are already ready for the party to start, but it won't start until 10:00 p.m.! It was outrageously late at night, but hey, the later the better, right? You were invited by your friend at two in the morning! Is she crazy? Probably, but she is still one of the nicest people you have ever known. Currently, you were inside another one of your friend's house as she panicked and scrambled around looking for an outfit. You told her she looked fine but she wouldn't listen to you. She didn't realize that all of the clothes in her closet were practically designer clothing, minus the fact that she made most of them.

"Meenah, don't just stand there! Do something!" she said to you as she pulled out another outfit from her walk-in closet.

Okay and when you say walk-in closet, you mean you could probably walk a few miles into there and still not find the end. Well, not that you would walk in there and find out, but it looks like a glubbing long way and you didn't want to get lost in there, so you stood your ground. She came out with another outfit and turned to you.

"What about this one?"

You rolled your eyes. This was the twenty-seventh time she had asked you, and all of your answers have been the same.

"It looks fabulous Porrim, reelly, it does. But seariously, CHOOSE A DANG OUTFIT!"

She gave you a stern look. You were in for another lecture about how clothes said everything about everyone and that certain occasions called for different styles, but instead of that, you both heard a loud crash from the living room. You run out to investigate but are quickly disappointed in your find. You had just ran out of Porrim's room to see another one of your friends on the ground after he had tripped over something. You think.

"Geez, what the glub are you doing here?" you ask, giving him a look of disapproval.

He looked at you and narrowed his eyes. He stood up and dusted himself of and looked at you directly in the eyes (even though he was shorter than you).

"Why would you even care Meenah? Besides, the point here is why are _you_ here? I do not recall having any notifications on the fact that you would be here, and in addition but I am not limiting to the facts that-"

"Oh my glub, no one gives a dolphin flip! Porrim! Will you please tell your moirail to shut up?"

"Nope."

"-and to conclude to the fact that you do not even respect many people, but you also-"

"Please Porrim? I'm begging you, just make Kankri shut up!"

"Hold on!"

"-which only adds on to another reason of why-"

By this time, your ears were numb and the only thing you knew was going on was that there was a fuzzy noise going through your head and that Porrim came out of her bedroom looking drop-dead gorgeous. Now, you thought that sounded really weird coming from you, but to hell with that idea. You were her flipping friend and she looked amazing, end of sentence. She walked over to your other friend (should you even consider him a friend?) and slapped the back of his head. He fell to the floor and landed on his face, making you laugh out loud. You stopped laughing once Porrim gave you a glare; she then turned her attention to Kankri.

"Wha-? Porrim, why did you- oh um…"

You were now containing the second burst of laughter that was soon to be ensued. He had accidently looked up Porrim's skirt. Now, you know he didn't do that intentionally and you felt a little bad for him, but you couldn't help but feel the need to laugh. Porrim, though, didn't look like she cared at this point in time nor did she seem to care that he seemed to be having a fit on the floor.

"P-Porrim, you really s-shouldn't wear that, it is triggering in so many ways and-"

"Kankri, why do you think I called you over for some help? Do you think I did it to tease you over my sexy outfits?"

"Oh , I see, I would suppose… but might I ask what she is doing here?"

"Hm? Oh, well both of you are over here to help me. You are here to make sure nothing is too "triggering" and she is here to make sure that what you choose actually looks fashionable."

"Wait what? You want me and him to collaborate on somefin that you're going to wear, when we have two uniquely different styles? How is _that_ supposed to work?"

"Yes. To be quite honest, Kankri has no style and you do, but your problem is that some things you like are too exposing and "triggering". That is why I choose the both of you to help me out."

"Oh, come on Porrim, it's not like it's supposed to be an extremely fancy party." You say, shaking your head as a flustered Kankri got up and dusted himself off yet again.

"I know that! I just can't decide what to wear out of my _casual_ outfits!"

You and Kankri just stared at her like she was insane. How many outfits did that girl have anyways? Nevertheless, you both followed her back to the room. You began to wonder who started the whole idea of the party anyway…

**Be the person who started the whole thing:**

You are the person who started everything, except getting Eridan drunk, Eridan to kiss Aradia, and so on and everything to do with Eridan. But you _did_ start the party idea/concept. Yes, you were the master mind behind everything. You even suggested Gamzee should have a party, you just didn't think it would take place at his house. You look down at your phone and look at the new message you just received:

The deed is done my friend.

That's all you'll ever disclose to anyone; those few simple words that hold so much power. Oh, the things you have started, you even invited more people. You looked at your phone once more and saw that the time was 9:45 A.M. They should be awaking soon…

**Be the people, er, person who is awaking soon*****cough cough* now:**

You wake feeling cranky and annoyed at the fact that you were cold. Okay, well it wasn't _that_ cold but hey, you had to find _something_ to be mad at; and then there was the thing you _weren't_ mad at. You look to your left and held the being of your happiness closer. All she did was mumble in her sleep and shift closer to you. You felt yourself blush. Again. Except this time you felt it rush all the way to your ears and down your neck. Oh god it is so obvious how you feel about her. She shifts and mumbles again, indicating that she was about to wake up. Now that you're thinking about it, you have never seen her wake up. You feel yourself blush even harder and shook the thought out of your head. You should not get those thoughts in your head! They are triggering and have no business being in your mind!

"Hey Karkat… Good morning…"

You look over at her and feel the heat return to your face.

"G'morning sleeping beauty." you said as you bent down and kissed her forehead.

She smiled and took ahold of one of your hands and squeezed it. You squeezed back and shifted to your weight to your left shoulder. You then proceeded to use your remaining hand to push some hair off of her face, causing her to blush a little. You couldn't help but smile at her reaction. That was when everything came rushing back to you. Where was everybody else? You turn your head a full 180o until you could completely see your alarm clock. 9:57?! What in God's glory were you doing up at 10:00? Especially on a weekend! You had so much crap to clean up you didn't want to think about it, and then you heard laughing.

Oh, that's right.

They're still fucking here.

You slowly turned over and got up and off of your bed. You were still in your clothes so you just kind of walked over to your desk and combed your hair. Even though you had more pressing matters at the time, you cared a little about your appearance and did not care to let people know you were sleeping.

"Guys, it's not funny!"

"Oh yes it is!"

"Yeah, it just looks so adorabubble!"

You seriously are wondering what the crap your friends got up into during the time you had spent asleep. You put your comb down and started to walk towards the door when Terezi sat up on your bed. She beckoned you to come over and you did, sitting next to her and smiling.

"So, what are you going to do with the neighbors?" she asked, pointing towards your living room.

You chuckled and patted her head.

"I'm going to go tell them to shut the fuck up."

That made her snicker, which resulted in an almost evil cackle, but since she still looked tired, it was more cute than anything. You got up again and walked out the door. You are greeted by someone's body landing on you. Not that it hurt or anything, it was just really _fucking annoying_ for this time of the morning; which is about the same as all times of the day/night. As you both fell to the floor in a disgruntled mess, you hear Vriska laugh and Feferi gasp. Feferi then rushed over and to help the person who was wearing a very colorful dress and who landed on top of you. Once she was done with her, she helped you up too.

"Thanks Fef." You hear from the girl in front of you.

"Heh, no problem! But seriously, it looks absolutely beautiful on you!"

"Fef, no it does not!"

"Dude, it so does, pft! Hahaha!"

Vriska started laughing again as you gave them both confused looks. To be honest with yourself, the new girl sort of sounded like a guy, but who can judge? You looked at Vriska and mouthed 'Who's the new girl?' and she bursted out with another fit of laughter.

You take a closer look at the girl in front of you and realize something. The same facial structure, the same attitude, the same everything. It suddenly dawned on you of who you were _actually_ looking at. The next sentence that Vriska said was not needed, but only confirmed your suspicions.

"That's not a girl, -haha- that's -heheh- Eridan!" she manages to get out through her laughter.

"Oh my cod, uh, hi Kar…" Eridan was now blushing, well, more than he probably was when you entered the room.

He stumbled backwards and tripped, well, fell over the couch armrest and landed in Sollux's lap. Sollux just smirked as Eridan's face grew a darker shade of red, almost to the point where it looked like, the dress that Aradia was now wearing? You were very confused now, but you soon found the source of your confusion. Kanaya was making a dress for Vriska as she stood there laughing.

"Aradia, since you seem to be the only ethical one left in this room, please tell me what the_ hell_ is going on?"

"Hm? Oh yeah, sure! Starting off from where you disappeared, Kanaya and Vriska trapped Eridan before he could leave and somehow persuaded him to get into a dress that Kanaya had made. When Sollux and I were about to leave, they caught us too, but Sollux was spared since they grabbed me first. Kanaya ended up making this lovely dress for me and now she's making one for Vriska. I think she intends on keeping us here until she's made a dress for everyone, probably even you too Karkat!"

You collect all of this info into you mind, trying to connect the pieces together. You look around the room and count the people there. Equius 1, Sollux 2, Feferi 3, Eridan 4, Aradia 5, Kanaya 6, yourself 7, Vriska 8, you know Terezi was in your room so 9. That left Nepeta, Gamzee and Tavros missing. You had a sick feeling of where Tavros and Gamzee were, but what about Nepeta? You moved into the kitchen and instantly knew that she was in the pantry. How? You don't know nor care; you just go and open the doors. Maybe you remembered? Oh well, as you said, you don't care. When you do, Nepeta looked extremely tired. You can tell she had taken a long cat nap before you had gotten to her, and she was practically moving like a sloth.

"Oh, hey Karkitty… wait, Karkitty?"

All of a sudden she was energized and you found yourself on the floor again. Then, she kissed you.


	3. Chapter 3

You are now Karkat Vantas, and your best friend just kissed you after spending a whole night in your pantry. She was also, _still_ kissing you. You push her off and roll over onto your stomach. You look up and see Sollux staring at you in disbelief.

"What have you done Karkat?"

"Wait, whoa. If you're talking about what just hap-"

"No, you let Nepeta out. Do you know what you've done?" he asked again, now backing away from you.

"Hold on dude, you knew she was in there?"

He didn't say anything else; he just shook his head, turned around, and ran out to the living room. You curse under your breath. What did you do wrong? She shouldn't have been in the pantry in the first place! You hear your other pantry door open and you look over to see Nepeta reach in and grab two Red Bulls. She looks at you and smiles, popping open both cans at the same time. By the time you're sitting up, she is right next to you, offering you one of the cans. You scrunch your face at the smell of it, but accept it nonetheless. She smiles again and takes a giant gulp from her can.

You mentally slap yourself in the face. She had just kissed you and you brush it off like it was nothing, then to add on to that, you accept a very poisonous drink that could possibly make you go crazy. You feel as if you should say something, but she looks so happy that you decided to stay quiet. You take a sip of the Red Bull while you're in a daze, and, realizing your mistake in drinking it, spit it back out. You swear that drink is as sour as your mood in the morning; which is as sour as you are 24/7. Nepeta gives you a confused look but smiles again. Oh wait, what is she-

You're suddenly pushed against the wall with a smiling Nepeta in your face. She takes a sip of her Red Bull and then leans in closer to your face. You're about to say something when her lips makes contact with yours. What she did afterwards made you surprised and mentally confused. She pushed the awful tasting beverage into your mouth and got you to swallow it. She came away looking pleased with her work.

"Soooo, what did mew think?"

You blush and wipe your mouth with the cuff of your sleeve, still finding the drink despicable. She gives you a hopeful look and you sigh, knowing that to keep her happy, you had to lie. You manage a smile and hope that she can't see through your actions.

"I-it's, uh, an okay drink… for now; b-but don't be surprised if I hate it later though!"

Her only response was her face lighting up like a Christmas tree.

"That's okay! As long as mew enjoyed it!"

She hugs you and kisses your cheek. She begins to purr as you hug her back (because it would be too awkward if you didn't).

"Nepeta! What are you doing?"

Equius comes to the entrance way of the kitchen with his hands on his hips and his mouth and eyebrows frowning in a disapproving manner, if eyebrows could even frown. Sollux and Aradia are standing behind him, looking at you from around the towering figure that is now blocking the lights from the kitchen.

"Oh hello Equius! I am so happy right meow~"

Equius spied the Red Bull in her hand and face palmed. He took it from her and started to walk away when she jumped up from your hug and ran in front of him, her attitude completely changed.

"Don't mew _dare_ think of throwing that away." She threatened, pointing at his face, her index finger inches away from his nose.

"Nepeta, this is for you own-"

"Good? Like spending the night in the pantry? Don't think mew'll get off the hook for that Equius. I'm still mad about that."

"Oh my… Nepeta, you are being irrational."

"Ha! Says the one throwing away a purrfectly good beverage!"

"How could you use a cat pun for such a situation?"

"Because I flipping can Equius, now hand it over."

She stuck her hand out and glowered at Equius, waiting for him to make his move. He slowly moved the can back in her direction, but stopped before it got within arm's length.

"Only if you agree that this will be your last one."

Oh God, he was still trying to win this war. You stand up, walk over, and take the drink from his hand. You pass it to Nepeta and turn on your heel to look at Equius.

"Dude, do you really think you were going to win? Seriously, even I'm sane enough not to make deals with her when she's… you know… logic just doesn't make sense to her when she's like this!"

You motion to Nepeta chugging the drink like a thirsty person finding water after days in the desert. She quickly drains it and looks at the Red Bull in your hand. You hand it over without a second thought. As she started to chug down on the next can, you walk around Equius and out of the kitchen, walking in to see Tavros and Gamzee had reappeared, and Feferi, Vriska and Kanaya adding things to Eridan's hair. You shook your head. You had to kick them out before this party went on to long. Your doorbell rings and you really hope that it was your neighbors; you really needed to yell at someone right about now.

You open the door and are frozen in shock. Since when did you-

"Hello Karkat! My sister said there was a party?"

Oh God no. She did not just do that.

"Well yeah but-"

"Ok, thanks!"

Muelin just skipped by you as you stare at the spot where she used to stand. What the hell was wrong with Nepeta? Why did she invite her sister? Hold on a second.

"Hey, Muelin, wait up!"

You close the door, turn around and run after Muelin, hoping that what you thought happened did _not_ just happen. When you caught up to her, she had already found Nepeta. They were talking obsessively to each other about something when you walked up to both of them. They both went silent when you cleared you throat.

"Yes Karkitty?" Nepeta asked, giving you a little smile.

"Nepeta, did you invite Muelin?"

Her smile faded a little, but was still plastered on her face. She nodded, and then you turned your attention to Muelin.

"Muelin, did you invite anyone else?"

She nodded her head too. You face-palmed. Where did this go wrong?

"How many?"

"Eleven."

You just double face-palmed. _Why_ did this go wrong?

"Who?"

Muelin pulled out her phone and showed you who she forwarded it to. You read the list three times before it finally sunk in. Everyone's siblings were coming over. Apparently the shock had taken over your face because Muelin started to get a worried look on her face.

"They all say yes."

"Excuse me?" Muelin asked you, giving you a questioning look.

"The replies. They all say yes. You do realize that no else was ever supposed to be invited do you?"

They both go silent. You seriously hoped they were smarter than this. You thought your friends had at least an IQ of over 60 but you guess you were mistaken. You don't want to be here, you want to be out of this mess, out of your life, because frankly, life was sucking right about now. You decide you'll be someone else, but who?

Ah, they look like a good person to be.

You decide to be the cool kid with shades.

**Be the cool kid with shades:**

Yeah, you're the cool kid with shades. And these just aren't any shades; these are shades you received for your birthday from a dear friend of yours. Since then, you have never taken them off. Ever. Good luck haters, `cause you ain't taking these babies off for anything, even your funeral. Now let's go back to the top and introduce you properly. You are Dave, Dave Strider; the best artist you have ever known and the second most ironic and hysterical guy you have ever met. Now, why are you, Dave Strider, the second best in being ironic and hilarious? Well, because your Bro is the first, that's why.

You look down at your watch and see that you should probably start leaving in five minutes. What, you're curious as to what you're going to do? Man, don't forget that you have to go pick up Jade! Without you, she'll have no ride to the party, _and_ she probably would have gone in her work clothes. Yeah.

You pull on a shirt over your head and look in the mirror. Did you mention that before you were shirtless? Yeah, guess not, but that's not important. What _is_ important though is that you are looking at a damn sexy body in the mirror. Who is that sweet looking guy? The guy who looks like he could throw down some sick beats in a moment's notice and chill out with his friends afterwards like nothing happened. Yeah he's cool-OH WAIT! That's you, and you are everything previously described. Yup, you are just that cool and ironic. Like a Starburst. Wait, what the heck are you doing comparing yourself to a Starburst? That candy isn't even half good!

You sigh as your brain goes into turmoil over Starbursts. They really are a contradiction. You go to your bed and straighten it out to make it look like you at least _tried_ to make it. When you turn around you are slapped in the face with another one of Bro's puppets. God dammit they were getting annoying. You were about to just rip off its head from its fluffy bottom when it disappeared from your hands. Oh God. He was home. You thought he was going to be out all day, but you guess your prediction was off today. You earnestly grab at your phone but it's too late. You turn around to see your Bro's back facing towards you as he sat non-chalantly in your window. You stand there and to wait till he's done with whatever he wants to do with it. He chuckles and you feel you face heat up.

"So, you takin' your girlfriend to a party?"

"Yeah, and?"

"Can I come with?"

"Hell no!"

"Aw, well that's just too bad sport, because I'm coming anyways."

"Bro!"

"Don't worry little dude, I have a solution to what your fretting over."

"Oh yeah, and what am I fretting over?" you say, plopping onto your bed.

"Me being your Bro and ruin this party. I know how to make myself younger, like, your age younger."

"Dude, do _not_ dress up like Justin Beiber." You say, pointing your finger at him accusingly.

"Relax little dude, if I did that, it would be like cross-dressing; which, _though_ ironic, it would be hurtful to my pride as an amazing person. Besides, don't you trust the fact that I'm a good mechanic and can make such a mechanism that can turn back time?"

"Mechanic?" you ask, hoping that he could see through his shades and to sanity. "No mechanic can make something to make you younger, you know that."

"Or do I? You see Dave, once I change, you will have to call me Dirk, and even though I will still be your older brother when I do change, my memory won't be the same."

"What do you mean?"

"Okay, well when I change, I will see you as an equal to myself now. Technically what I'm doing with the mechanism is that I'm reversing time on myself."

You didn't like admitting it, but this has got to be one of the weirdest shit he has ever come up with. How on Earth did he think this was going to work? You give him a doubtful look but regret it immediately. He looks a little hurt and his face tenses. What if he's not lying?

"Bro…"

He gets out of the window sill and pulls up a chair, sitting in it backwards so he facing you.

Okay, you won't lie, his idea is pretty cool. Even if he is lying, might as well just go with the flow right? He hasn't been around a lot nowadays so might as well just be cool and do a bunch of shit before he leaves again.

"I know it sounds crazy but you have to believe me." Bro says, looking a little desperate to try and convince you. "I mean I know your sixteen and in a rebellious phase but-"

"That is so awesome! Why haven't you said anything about this before?" you say, a bit over enthusiastic, but hey, what kid wouldn't be excited over a time-traveling device?

He looks a bit shocked, but his lips formed into a smile; his face relaxing again.

"Well how about I go show you what it does then we can talk some more, like equals."

You grin as he stands up.

"Sounds like a plan, Dirk."

**Be some random guy that I couldn't think of a transition for:**

So, you're now that guy that the author has randomly decided to be introduced. Do you think you were a last minute decision? No. Do you think that I (as in the author) was just desperate to throw you into the story? Yes. Now that you feel insignificant, your introduction will continue. You are now some pitiful feeling guy, but you don't remember why. You walk to your computer and log onto Pester Chum. You see that you have a message from one of your friends.

**- tentacleTherapist [TT] started pestering ectoBiologist [EB] -**

TT: Hello John, I do hope you have heard of the party that will be taking place.

TT: If not, I am here to extend an invitation out to you.

TT: Please respond within the next few minutes or else this invitation will be null.

EB: oh hey Rose! i hope its not too late to except that invitation to that party of yours

TT: You've finally responded.

EB: im sorry! i was just introduced so its not my fault I couldn't answer earlier!

TT: Um, introduced? John, what are you on?

EB: nothing, why?

TT: …

EB: …

EB: so where is this party taking place?

TT: Here, let me just send you all of the information.

**- tentacleTherapist [TT] sent the file **** to ectoBiologist [EB] -**

EB: oh, i see now!

EB: this helps a lot

TT: Does it?

EB: yeah it does

EB: so Jade Dave you and i are going right?

TT: Dave actually just sent me a text saying that he was bringing a few more friends.

EB: really? sweet!

EB: this is going to be an awesome party!

TT: I truly hope it is, though I wish my mom would come to the party, but she said she had to go do something before she could go anywhere.

EB: aw, really?

EB: well thats too bad I guess

EB: im sorry Rose

TT: No, don't be. It's probably something to do with work or something, so it's really no big deal.

EB: alright if you say so

TT: John, I have a weird question to ask, but may you please answer it?

EB: yeah sure

EB: shoot

TT: If you were to take anyone with you to the party from your family, who would you take?

EB: huh

EB: oh well thats easy!

EB: i would take my grandma, mastermind of all great pranks!

TT: Really?

EB: well, if she was alive anyways

EB: but we would have such a blast!

TT: Oh, I see. Well, I have to go get ready.

EB: alright, see you soon!

TT: Oh wait, John. Do you mind if you give me a ride?

TT: My mom already left and I have no idea how else I'll get there.

EB: yeah sure thing Rose!

EB: ill be by your house in about ten minutes

EB: I just have to strife with my dad first

TT: Alright, understandable.

**- tentacleThereapist [TT] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] -**

You push yourself out of your desk chair and stretch. Well, now was the time to go Strife with Dad. You open the door cautiously as to make no noise. When the door is successfully open with just enough space for you to squeeze through, you take a peek outside. Your nostrils are filled of the scent of cake. You quickly reach the conclusion that he's in the kitchen. You put one foot outside the door when you notice something on the floor. Gushers. Trailing along the hallway and the stairs are Gushers, perfectly line up, leading to an unknown location. You narrow your eyes. The game is on now.

You stalk out of your room and down the stairs, collecting them along the way. When you reach the end of the path, on the table is a ripped open Gushers packet with the Betty Crocker logo on it. You stick out your tongue in disgust. How dare she put her logo on these beautiful creations? You pick up the wrapper and hear a crinkle. You turn around the packet and see this note:

**Dear Son,**

**I am so very proud of you for following the trail. I now know that you able to handle yourself when it comes to these situations. This is just one more step towards man-hood.**

**Love Dad**

You stare at the letter and crush it along with the Gushers packet in your now tightly clenched fist. He knew this was coming. You put a mouthful of Gushers in your mouth as you walk silently walk towards the kitchen. A silent nagging feeling in the back of your head says that you shouldn't have eaten them. You counter with why not and the feeling goes away for a second; but only a second. It comes back with the defense that they were on the floor. You think who cares but in reality you stopped chewing and are now making your way to a garbage can. You spit them out as you looked at the time. It was already 10:06! You only had four minutes to Strife with your Dad and get Rose. God this was going to seem like forever.

You youth roll into the kitchen to see your Dad finish making one of his infamous cakes. The only one who seems to dislike them was you, but that's alright. The hero is usually against the crowd in such trivial matters, so why couldn't you? Dad threw the newly baked cake at you as you dodged to the left of it, the frosting barely getting to your hair. As the cake splattered behind you, you took the only thing nearest to you: a hammer. You smash two or three more cakes before your Dad gets bored and turns around to make more cakes. You stop him before he could start the next cake. He gives you a look of disapproval. 'You should never stop a man from doing his duty son.' he would say, but he doesn't. Instead he continues to look at you, hoping that you'll just walk away, but instead you ask if he could take you and a friend to a party. He looks at the clock and nods. 'How much time?' he asks. Two minutes you say. 'Then let's go' he says. You both jump in the car and you're at Rose's house in less than a minute.

When you had gotten there, Rose was standing out in her drive way in a dress that wasn't too fancy or to normal. It was a nice lilac color, which compliments her eyes. When you get out of the car, you point this out to her and she blushes; then she gave you a little more serious look as if she was doing this for business. She was still smiling though, so you dismissed this as her way of dealing with embarrassment.

"What took so long John?" she asked when you two were walking towards the car.

"Uh, I'll tell you later." You say, holding open the door for her as your Dad nodded in approval from the front seat.

She nodded and got in. You half ran, half jogged back to your side of the car and hoped into your seat. You buckled you seat belt and nodded at your dad, who started driving. Your dad was going over the speed limit by twenty miles per hour, but no cops were there to stop him. When you finally got at your destination, you looked over at Rose. She was smiling, which showed that she at least found your dad cool and that she had fun while driving five feet in the air at times when going over some steep hills. She looked over at you and you smiled back, which made you feel really good on the inside. She got out of the car by herself despite your protests and took a few steps away from the car, and stood there to wait for you. You reached for your door handle to join her outside when you felt something. You looked down and read the note that was quickly but neatly taped onto the door handle.

**Dear Son,**

**It makes me proud to know that you have gone this far in your life. Keep up the good job and you will be rewarded with bountiful things.**

**Love Dad**

You looked up at him and he smiles at you. You have a feeling good moment x2 and get out of the car. You joined up with Rose and watched your dad as he drove away, both of you waving good bye in his direction.

"He's not a bad dad John."

"Yeah, I know; he just makes _way_ to much cake!"

You both giggle as you turn around and look at the house. You could hear music seeping out through underneath the door and the inside was pretty dark. You quickly wondered how late you were, but the thought quickly vanished. _All_ awesome people were late, _fashionably late_. You both start to walk towards the door when you hear a screeching from down the road opposite of where your father went.

**Be the screeching noise from down the street:**

Okay, well you obviously can't be a noise, but you can be the source of it. You are now currently trying to take back the wheel of your car from your best friend.

"Meenah, would you _please_ let go of the wheel before we all die?"

"We're not going to die!"

"Yes we are you idiot!"

"Whale guess what my frond, we're almost there so you just have to wade a little whale!"

While you and Meenah were fighting, there were two innocent people in the back of the car. Your childhood friend Kankri, and Meenah's childhood friend Cronus. You were pretty sure Meenah and Cronus had something going on, but you couldn't really tell for certain. What? You and Kankri? No, that is out of the question! He was a dear friend and nothing more. On this weird online game that you and all your friends play, you and he would be considered "moirails".

Anyways, going back to the current situation, you were either going to die or pull out of this one alive, but with a really big negative side. You have a feeling that con would be your car getting totaled.

"Meenah, please just let go of the vwheel so that we can all livwe a fewv more hours." Cronus said from the back.

"Shut the dolphin flip up Cronus!" she shouted back, swerving dramatically to the other side of the road.

You yell at Meenah while she yells at Cronus while Cronus pleaded with you to make her stop. You were about to burst with pure rage when there was another shout.

"WOULD YOU ALL FUCKING SHUT THE HELL UP?"

The whole car goes silent, and you even got the great idea to step on the breaks. This resulted in jerking the whole car forward and initiating a small "Fuck!" from the back of the car. You turn around and look at the person who said it.

"Kankri, did you just cuss?"

"Yes, indeed I did. It seems that the only way you people will ever listen to me is if I do something unexpected or worth your while. Now Porrim, will you please switch places with me?"

"Do what?"

"Just do it."

You hop out of the car and switch with Kankri, while Cronus and Meenah exchange glances.

"We're probubbly going to go ten miles per hour." whispered Meenah.

"Vwell, vwe'll just havwe to find out." Cronus whispered back.

Now that you were all situated, Kankri looked at all of you.

"Do you want me to turn this car around?"

You all shake your heads in unison at his question, wondering why he would just abandon the party you were all headed to.

"Good, then behave yourselves and buckle in."

Now, even though you were sure the screeches could be heard by the house that you guys were going too, you were still pretty far away. Like, five-miles-or-more far away. You quickly buckled in your seat, knowing full well how Kankri drove. Yes, he passed his driving test and yes, he was a _very_ safe driver, but he could get away with a lot on the streets because of some of his connections. And before anyone asks, no, you don't know his connections.

Meenah and Cronus obviously did not how he drove or his connections, so their poor souls were launched into the back of their seats when Kankri pushed the gas petal all the way to the floor. The car jerked forward and you guys were off at 95 mph. The speed limit was 45. Meenah looked petrified and Cronus was in shock. You, of course, were used to this. He said he had to learn this, and for what reason, you don't know, but you were asked to point out things he had missed according to a pamphlet he had handed you, so you sat in the back of the car and pointed out said things. By one week he had mastered the rules in the pamphlet and according to one of his sources (and you still don't know who that guy is), he had done over the expected level.

In less than a minute, you arrived at the house, with two people standing the drive way agape at your arrival. You smiled, knowing that you had at least made a good entrance. You walked out of the car elegantly as soon as it had stopped and turned to Cronus, who now looked like a statue (or a weeping angel, whatever you prefer).

"Cronus, if you stay in here, he might start driving again."

Those few words from you were enough motivation for him to jump out of the car, though he wasn't very agile, he did get out. Apparently Meenah had heard your comment too because she stumbled out of the car, pulling at her twins braids as she alighted to the ground. You looked over at the two people mentioned earlier who were still standing with their mouths open. The girl seemed to compose herself first as she approached you.

"Hello, my name is Rose Lalonde, and who might you be?"

You smiled. You really liked this girl; she had some gut to approach you after the little stunt that Kankri had pulled. For some reason you think you've heard of her before, but you're not sure where. Why not become her and find out?

**Be Rose Lalonde:**

"My name is Porrim Maryam, nice to make your acquaintance Rose," replied the stranger.

Maryam! She must be Kanaya's older sister! She always talked so fondly about her and now you finally got to meet her. You can now see why Kanaya admired her so much, because now you do too. You smile politely at her and hold out your hand for a hand shake.

"Ah, so you're Kanaya's sister; it is so nice to finely meet you. She speaks very fondly of you and I now see why." You say as Porrim took your hand and shook it.

"Ah, so she talks about me huh? I hope she hasn't said anything embarrassing about me." she said, chuckling a bit as she smiled back at you.

"No, she hasn't said anything embarrassing about you. Well, at least not yet." you reply, beckoning her to walk with you to the door of the house.

"Well that's good to know." She said walking next to you as John followed behind both of you.

You reach the door and ring the bell. You hear a few muffled yells as someone opens the door. It was Karkat, who was still shorter than you.

"Oh my God, Muelin, why did you invite them _all?"_

"Nepeta said I could though."

An exasperated sigh escaped from Karkat as he held open the door for you three to walk in. John patted Karkat on the shoulders as he walked by, just to reassure him that everything should be okay, but all Karkat did was grunt. You giggled a bit at his reaction but stopped when you saw Kanaya was already there.

"Kanaya!" Porrim says excitedly, walking over to her sister with strides of confidence. "So, your friend Rose, I might have to steal her for a while. She's really nice and is actually one of the few kids that are actually smart from your sad bunch of friends; not that mine is any better." She said excitedly as she wrapped her arm around her sister's shoulders.

Kanaya smiled at hearing this.

"That's good to know. At least one of my friends made a good impression on you."

"Oh yes, she did indeed. I have a feeling very intelligent conversations are to come from this young lady." Porrim said as she patted you on the back.

You smiled a little more. Honestly, it felt good to be complimented by people who are just as smart as you. Not that Dave, John, or Jade weren't smart, they just weren't your level of smart.

"So, how have you been Rose?" Kanaya asks, looking over at you happily.

"I'm as fine as ever and how might you be Kanaya?"

"Just swell right now. Speaking of, since I just finished Vriska's dress, would you like for me to make you one?"

"Oh yes, that would be very kind of you Kanaya."

She smiled and turned around to face the living room.

"Oh, and Sollux, you're next." She claimed, giving him a nothing but devious look.

His face paled as he heard her threat but he continued to ignore her as he watched T.V. with Equius. Speaking of Equius, we haven't heard his side of the story yet have we? Well then, let's hear it shall we?

**Be Equius:**

You are now Equius, the person watching television with your acquaintance Sollux Captor. You take a glance over at him and then back at the television. Why did he have to be dating the girl you secretly loved? You showed no interest in her, no, but that is because it would have caused an uproar. You and she were just friends, but you always have wished it was a little more.

"Hey, Equiuth, what ith thith thow?"

You look at him, then back at the screen, trying to contemplate the question. When it finally registers to you, you turn back to him.

"I have no idea, but we shall find out."

You pick up the remote and press _Guide_. It shrinks the show you're watching to the corner and highlights what the name of what the show is.

"It is My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic." You say, answering his previous question.

Of course you knew what this show was, this was all you watched when you were growing up, but you would never let anyone know that, even dear Nepeta, your second cousin, would never know.

"What, the, thit. Who watcheth thith crap anywayth?" he says back, a disgusted looked contorted on his face.

You are about to defend the show and on how he should never insult Rainbow Dash and her friends when Aradia walked up in a stunning red dress that was very befitting of her figure.

"Oh, I used to watch this when I was younger! Ha ha, it doesn't really look like nothing much has changed!"

"Y-you did? W-who was your favorite Aradia?" you asked, surprised she had even watched such a show.

"Huh? Oh, well I liked Vinyl Scratch the most. Do you have a favorite Equius?"

"U-um, I uh, I like Rainbow Dash." You say now, feeling your head start to break out in sweat.

"Okay, dude, theriouthly?" Sollux says from his couch. "I can thee a girl watching it, but a guy? That ith jutht thad…"

"Oh come one Sollux, it's not that bad! Besides, once you watch it, it's actually really interesting." Aradia retorted, giving you an apologetic glance which made your heart flutter.

"Oh come on AA, even _you_ admitted that you don't watch it anymore!"

"Yes but that doesn't mean you should make fun of other people who do!"

"AA, come on-"

"Sollux!"

He looked at her dumbfounded and a little hurt. He sighed and plopped back into the couch, for he had stood up during the argument.

"I'm thorry."

You look at him in surprise, and then look at Aradia. She nodded toward you, indicating that that it was you to whom his apology was to.

"U-uh, apology accepted. Just, d-don't try to offend others in the future. Please. It's only a suggestion though, n-not an order. Besides, guys who watch this show are called a 'brony', or, so I've heard."

"Okay dude, I get it, I get it. And by the way, Rainbow Dash isn't half bad, but Vinyl Scratch is _way_ better."

"You've watched this before Sollux?" Aradia asked, just as surprised as you were.

"Only two words. Bass. Canon."

"Oh my gosh, you do watch it! How come you never told me?"

"Well for one thing, I only watch it with my brother. A second thing is that I've seen too much of it that I_ have_ to know what it is."

"Well, well, well, Sollux watches MLP with his autistic brother, how cute!" Vriska said to Sollux, sneering as she said it.

You also noticed she had on a dress, similar to the one Aradia had on accept a little more her style. When you say 'her style', you mean there were spider webs adorning every corner of her sharp-edged dress and silver glitter sparkling all over it to represent dew drops on the webs. She looked lovely, yes, but you had no interest in her. Never. Her manners were just so unprofessional you would never like someone of her caliber. Now her older sister was better, but still not up your expectations. You look back at Aradia, who was poised like a professional business woman. She was currently glaring at Vriska, but that didn't matter; you liked strong woman.

Before Aradia could say something, Feferi's older sister came up from behind Vriska and jabbed her index fingers into the sides of her stomach. Vriska cringed and fell to the floor a little over dramatically while Sollux and Aradia stifled their laughter. Meenah laughed evilly as Vriska used the couch as a lever to get up, a sour look on her face until she saw who was in command of the evil laughter.

"Ah, Meenah! Would you mind in assisting me in screwing with these dweebs?" Vriska piped up, her early thoughts of revenge completely washed away.

"Haha, not at all, but let me tell you somefin first!" Meenah replies, slapping Vriska's shoulder and pulled her aside and talked to her, earning a few chuckles from the latter.

"He said _what_ now?"

"I know, but I had to agree with him for once!"

"Vwait, are you ladies talking about vwhat I said earlier?"

"Obviously."

"Vwell evwen Meenah admitted I vwas right so don't judge."

They keep having a conversation that you could care less about-BUT WAIT! Everyone else does care so let's go ahead and switch to someone else's perspective to catch up with what was happening.

**Be the one vwith the vweird lisp:**

Excuse me, but your lisp is not weird, it's sexy, period. Anyways, back to what Meenah was talking about to Vriska, was a comment you made when just you and Meenah were outside. This is how it went:

"Vwovw, vwhat a ride huh?"

"Yeah, tell me about it. I am _never_ riding with him in the driver's seat again."

You look around now, finally getting a sense of your balance. You walk towards the garage and lean against it, tempted to take out one of your cigarettes, but you decide against it. You were trying to quit and you promised your dad you would quit by Christmas. You looked over at Meenah whom was staggering in your direction looking very sick.

"Okay, so next time, you drive."

"Obvwiously." You state, patting her back, trying to comfort her after the traumatizing experience with Kankri's driving.

"But you havwe got to admit," you say, Meenah looking up at you as you continued smiling, "that vwas kind of hot."

Meenah gave you a blank stare then started laughing really loudly, none of her evil cackles present. Just real, genuine laughing, which made your heart flutter a little.

"That is actually reelly true!" she said, wrapping her arm around your neck to support herself from falling over.

You smile at her and put your arms around her waist, making sure that she didn't face-plant into the driveway (and because you wanted to be closer to her but you wouldn't let her know that).

You hull her up to her feet and you drag her inside after yourself, immediately finding that a lot of other people had already arrived. Well, it's to be expected from being late. You shrug and walk off to the kitchen, leaving Meenah behind. You find Eridan in a dress and find it extremely hilarious but decide to act like a good brother and tell him he still looks as manly as hell even though he's in a dress. You add that it probably makes him look manlier than originally, earning a slap on the shoulder from him and Feferi. Okay, so you were a little mean to him but whatever, what did matter now is that you felt like you were being talked about. How do you know? It's because you are just that damn awesome and you felt a sneeze coming on. (The only reason you were hooked on the fact of people sneezing when they were talked about is because Damara practically hammered it into to your head all the time because of her Japanese manga or whatever.)

You turn around and you see Meenah and Vriska talking and you automatically know it's them. You march over to them and that brings you to the present.

"So now what Cronus? Are you going to go make-out with him now because of that?"

"Meenah, don't joke about that, he might take it seriously!" Vriska said next to her, giggling like a drunken fool (she probably was drunk).

"Come one Vriska, I don't think he would actually do it!" Meenah cackled, blushing slightly at the thought.

"Oh, so you doubt me nowv?" you ask, putting your hands on your hips.

"Obviously dork face! You wouldn't be able to kiss him even if you were really in love with him!" she spat at you, making you flinch, but soon to have a plan cross your mind.

"Vwell, vwe'll see about that." You say to yourself.

You turn around and catch Kankri's eyes. You motion him to come over to where you, Meenah and Vriska were standing and he nods, dismissing himself from his conversation with Tavros. When he comes over, Vriska and Meenah go silent, and look at you with grins as big as a role of cheese. (Yes, you just made a reference to a 'cheesy' smile. Get over it.)

"What would you like Cronus?" Kankri asked in his usual manner, his eyes full of wisdom that could probably explode anyone's brain if the brain cells were ever transferred to any other mind but his.

"Vwell, you see here, Meenah and Vwriska say that I can't do something and I am determined to prowve them vwrong."

"And what's that got to do with me?" Kankri asked, confusion crossing his face.

"Oh, just a little something." You say, taking a glance at Meenah and Vriska.

They were smiling like fools.

"Wha-"

Before Kankri could say any more, you pulled him into your arms and kissed him deeply on the mouth. You heard Meenah and Vriska gasp dramatically and Kankri's eyes widened at your actions. This was one of the best things you have ever done.


End file.
